Sitting up in bed, he slides out of the sheets as his girlfriend is still fast asleep. It's 3am he's worried about something. He reaches for his pack of cigarettes on the night stand. He sticks a fag into his lips and lights up in the dark. He's shirtless and wearing boxer short. He sits on the wooden parquet floor leaning against the wall at the corner of the bedroom. He watches his girlfriend fast asleep in bed, her long raven hair scrambled all over her pillow as she is faced down. The moonlight, creeping through the glass window illuminates her long neck and smooth bare back. And the white bedsheets covers her legs and teases him by covering her just below her tail bone. He takes another drag from his Marlboro Light, and stares at her in the moonlight. A thousand thoughts run through his head. The love they made. The love they would continue to make, for the next few days, and the rest of the week. For the next few months. And maybe for the rest of their lives. He thought about what she had said earlier that day. And how scared it made him feel. How scared he was of her. He remembered the anger he felt. The spite that ripped through his heart. But then he would remember the love they made that night, the way she looked and the comfort of her soft hands touching his face. He would forget all the nasty words she said with just a slight touch on his face. With a gentle whisper to his ear. It was so easy to make him happy. And she knew how to keep him happy.
But does she love me? He thought. As he sat at the corner, he thought so hard that it made his head hurt. His thoughts wrinkled his forehead and threw him into a deep lost stare into the darkness. His thoughts brought him far away for a long time, and he finished up a handful of cigarettes. The smoke filled the room in the darkness until finally, she woke up. Lifting her head up, she saw him staring at her. Still heavy with sleep, she lazily reached out her tiny hands towards the smoking man. With a child-like motion of her right hand - like that of a little girl trying to get her daddy to pick her up and give her a hug - she invites him back to bed . He obliges willingly. He tucked himself under the sheets and she wrapped her arms around him again, like they were several love-making hours ago. She gave him a peck on his forehead and an heard her whisper softly - "I love you."

(written in February 15, 2008 in Kangar)