Hello and peace be upon you.

I will stick around for the time being because I am sticking by my words, which I have written for the past many years. I can only pray that my decision is for the better. I wish to remain positive despite everything that has been hurled against me.

The change of my blog's title is inspired by a text message I received from a colleague yesterday. It said: "I'm on your side", and it made me realise, at this point in my life, I do not feel like having anyone by my side.

It is okay if I have to be alone in my life, thoughts and emotions. I rather be alone than to have someone support me. Let me be. Go away, all of you. Go away.

Of course I still will interact with colleagues at work, and with family members at home, but that's as far as it goes, for the time being.

I have no one to whom I confide to anymore, or at least for the past month or so.

I feel so alone in my life now. I have no friends whom I could readily call, because I feel that I have successfully distanced myself from all of them.

This loneliness has been occuring for at least a year now, and it causes me to drive around alone at night, aimlessly to far off places. I suppose I think that if I go further away, I may find someone or something I am looking for.

When I think of the lack of friends I have around me in town and out of town, I think that it would do me good to find a new scene and meet new people. Start over.

But I must be a friend first, before I could find a friend.

It was suggested that I should start over with my blogging activity, and that I should start another blog at another web address. But then I read over my entries over the past years and I feel reluctant to let them go.

Again, my decision may be for the better or for the worse. But I have to take this risk.