It hasn't been easy.
Ramadan has a way of making you feel more sad than usual.
Yes, I do think of you.
I had a revelation the other day after Sahur. I realised how insane a boyfriend I was.
I had uttered some very angry words at you.
I once told you that my parent was more important than you. Yes, in a way that should be true, parents are important.
But I have love for my folks and I have love for you as well.
I love you, I think I still do, but I know I must move on because we're no longer together.
I once called you 'angkuh' (meaning very proud or arrogant).
And of course, the worse incident was when I complained about sexual intimacy. That. Was. The. Last. Straw.
I realise all that now.
I realise that as much as you wronged me, I had also wronged you.

Ramadan has a way of making you think things clearly, you start to put things into perspective.
Your brain works better and you think things clearly because your body is not distracted with food and sex.
For better or for worse.
After going through my post-sahur breakdown/revelation, I wonder whether I should beg forgiveness from you. I already have- we did all the I'm sorries when we broke up.
Maybe this revelation is just for me. It's something for me to ponder on.